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I agreed to answer him honestly. What he asked did not seem difficult but it still made me yearn to do with him as I had with my brother. Then he asked if I could show him. I wondered if he was asking to see me naked or asking to be shown how to copulate. I had an intense desire to do both. I asked, Are you saying that you want to have sex with me? The moment I asked the question I was sure by the expression on his face that I had misinterpreted his intent. Dont make fun of me because I want to have sex you mom, he said as tears came to his eyes. I have always been a sucker for his tears. I wrapped him in my arms and gave him a motherly hug. As I felt him snuggle up to me I once again felt that deep down yearning. To fight it off I said to him, You know that some people believe that is the worst thing that a mother can do with her son. He only snuggled against me and softly sobbed. I went on, You know that if we did and anyone ever found out I could go to prison and we could never. The drunks pissing themselves. The addicts shooting their fix into their veins.It's not any belief that I'm better than them that makes me choose to not sleep there. No; I belong here. I am just as lost as any alcoholic, junkie, or whore who has ever stared at these same four walls.The reason I choose the floor is because I am alone.I wasn't always like I am now. I once believed in the faithful heart. I believed that I was a good man, a good husband. I believed that I loved.I believe none of those things now.I have been married for 10 years to the most wonderful woman I have ever known. Our life together had been good. She didn't deserve what I did to her.Up until three days ago I wouldn't have thought it possible that I could betray her. That I could make her sob. That I could push her down the slopes of hell. I never thought that I would do anything but spend my life with her, growing old and gray together, hand in hand.Until I met Lorie.My job is a sales rep, and I made an.
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